The Bulls have been losing plenty thanks to a helluva lotta bad batting. A great batter told me once, to hit well, you gotta feel sexy in the box. I feel like Jeffrey Skilling in the box right now—(who appears to be on the way to buying his way out of jail). I wanna feel like a big strong sexy horse with more sexy horseness growing out of my forearms.
Unfortunately, the idea of how to hit R.A. Dickey’s knuckleballs never
‘clicked’ for the Bulls. After the first batter reached on a single, Dickey retired 27 straight batters before a jubilant crowd of 62 in Buffalo yesterday.
the rays, the bulls

weird. What do we think the artist was trying to accomplish here?
anyway, the bulls have been posting boring football scores of late and stand atop the international league’s north division. However, the team has failed to knock the mascot off his go kart during his drive around the stadium but are getting closer each day.

Tonight, 6’9 272 lbs 1B Ryan Shealy, who has hit about 100 homers in the last 3 years will bat 8th for the Bulls. ”Tough league”, he said, when reached for comment during stretch.

corrosive(?) advice from Ted Turner…lunch on the road

Wall reads, ‘Do Something, either lead, follow, or get out of the way. -Ted Turner’
(from some steakhouse near Gwinnet, Georgia)

this is what a baseball team out to lunch looks like.
Jaso recalled to the Major Leagues.
do not hump
(don’t miss the google ad at the bottom of the page for African ladies)
news delivered to me by our first baseman who caught lots of Hellickson-induced putouts en route to another win which means it’s appropriate to play music, laugh as much as possible, sing falsetto or whatever you’re into in the clubhouse after the game. Executing the proper losing-atonement over dinner in the clubhouse has its charms, its probably a little like a meal at one of those monk retreats in which you oblige not to speak. The rest of it though, as it builds as losses stack up, starts to smell. It’s like being forced somehow to be somewhere a stink is perpetual and omnipresent, not the type that you get used to. If only everyone could hold it until they got home, a losing team could even be a little bit fun, by way of funny. That’s my college team’s only legacy really, humor.

(It’s possible that celibacy has played as vital a role in lowering my strikeout totals in 2010 as ceasing that “switch hitting” )
Fecheia a Porta

(Carlos Hernandez; diggin’ Amos Otis of the Royals, picking up the win last night)
Election chaos in sudan—
Bodies still being discovered in Pakistan—
Bulls win.
Hitting is a martial art insofar as
you can learn some version of it
in a strip mall somewhere
and theoretically be able to kick your way out of anything hairy,
or be able to hit Neftali Feliz, so long as you
remember what sensai said, and,
just do it (an ad campaign that disappeared(?)
invariably as people began asking what? and How?
and began responding otherwise to it as a mandate).
I am Gen Y, so sarcastic sometimes I annoy myself
and said, “that’s it”,
after each of the 70 MPH pitches in batting practice I hit straight up or behind me.
My pre-game drills yesterday were laughable.
Baseball is tough on types that
say their own names
at themselves pejoratively after they make a mistake.
[damn it michael]
Strangely, terrible batting practice almost ensures productivity at the plate during the game. You could probably attribute most of it to some ‘buckling-down’ ensuing during the game that doesn’t quite get aroused in practice, but this idea is passed on and reiterated by teammates in part because of the promise of the possibility of some baseball ensuing to the tune of handing you alms as opposed to flesh wounds. In my first AB I walked without even having to swing.
There are lucky lever pulls at atlantic city not specifically for a Steven or a Margie but for lever puller 649332 some tuesday—the ball kicks oddly off a perky patch of grass just out of reach of the middle infielders converging up the middle in white, they cannot reach the pinball.
I’ve made it to the bases!
But since I’m fast I’m immediately a suspect.

MF DOOM: ”just cause someone wears a mask doesn’t mean they did nothing automatically”.
No stolen bases today.
sometime during the game-
Well Known Major League Star currently playing for the Bulls:
“Why’d you play Doe so shallow?”
Me: “Doe? I thought his name was Roe. Roe’s stroke’s broke. Doe ropes?”
MLV: “Doe’s dope. You see his numbers last year?”
Me: I didn’t check. [dun dun dun]
(Doe hit 30 homers and knocked in 100.)
Before I could say thanks, the Veteran threw a water ballon at his feet and vanished in
a cloud of water vapor.
Bulls Win.
